User blog:ClancHuranku/Clanc's Epic Reviews of History 2
WHAT'S UP BITCHES!! I'm bored so I decided to make another one plagiarizing Mat4yo (sorry Mat). This one will be worse better, I promise! (?) Here's a review/analysis of: :::::: Beat OK, so we have the most evil man in the world against a similarl ruler from Star Wars, one of the most succesful franchises. This beat can't be wacky like the last one, it must be intense, it must be catchy, it must remind us that these people are evil, powerful and ruthless. And does this beat do that? Ehhh.... Kinda? The intro of the beat has a sense of tension, the bells and strings give a feeling that says "Here's the man that started a genocide and started WWII against the ruler of the Galaxy and the main antagonist of Star Wars". Obviously, this is not an orchesta, this is a Hip-Hop beat, so it can't stay like that. This is where the drums and bass kick in, adding power to the beat. However, the beat feels like something is missing. Sure, there's a hook and a drum loop (which doesn't seem to vary except in some parts) but there's almost nothing in the bass section except for, well, the bass. There could have been a sub-bass, there could have been a cello, but there aren't, which gives an empty feeling. Final Score: 80/100, could have been better Impresions Adolf Hitler The idea of wearing the hat to hide the fact that Lloyd is bald is, while still noticeable, clever, but I think it could have been done without the hat and using the wig they used for Bill O'Reilly (who is literally Hitler), aside from that, it's very well done. The made that iconic moustache Hitler had pretty well and convincing, the uniform is also spot on. Of course, this isn't a documentary, this is a comedy series. Peter and Lloyd aren't nazis, so they potrayed him as a hammy Card-Carying Villian that makes Vader look heroic. They also kinda bother with the German accent, something missing from the last battle. Score: 95/100 Darth Vader It's just Peter with a Darth Vader costume, lazy but convincing. The voice is also spot on, even including that sound effect and the heavy breathing in one part. Score: 100/100, easiest costume ever Others Aside from the main characters, there's a cameo of a Stormtrooper. which is just a dude in a hat. You can see his damn hand for crying out loud! Score: 65/100 Final Score: 90/100. Visuals Not really much to say here, they didn't have the budget or the experience to some kick ass visuals like they do in the later battles. What I like is the fact that Hitler is in black and white, something that reflects that it's a battle between two well known dictators, a real one from the past and a fictional one from the present. The scene where Vader uses the force on Hitler is awesome, hillarious ans well-deserved at the same time, the moment when Hitler goes from black and white to color is really well made. Also, the carbonite-frozen Hitler was very convincing considering the budget. Final Score: 75/100, it doesn't hold up to the newer battles, but impresive at the time. Lyrics Finally, what you came for! (?) EPIC RAP BATTLES OF HISTORY! (This really clashes with the beat if you ask me) DARTH VADER (Is he breathing or something?) VS (I wonder why did the people choose this battle, maybe because they are dictators? At least I'm glad that it's not something like Hitler vs Mussolini or Vader vs Luke. As a fun fact, the design of the Stormtroopers and Vader are based on the Nazis) ADOLF HITLER (They didn't make him a fearsome figure, I like this) BEGIN (This is unranked, of course) Adolf Hitler: I am Adolf Hitler: Commander of ze Zird Reich! (Let him finish for God's sake! Anyways, he's basically saying "Yes, I'm Lloyd Hitler, the very same. Yes, I started WWII. Yes, I exterminated a good chunk of the Jews in Europe. Yes, I leaded in a brutal dictatorship. Do I regret? NAH", but it's hard to think that a short man with a silly moustache did that, hence the potrayal) Little known fact: also dope on ze mic! (Nothing outstanding, he's just saying that he's a good rapper. But, intended or not, his speeches persuaded a lot of people to stand up and fight for a country devastated from the Great War and Great Depression. Indeed, he's dope on the mic) You are Vader, viz your little boots and cape, And helmet to cover up zat burnt-ass face! (Vader got his aspect because of a fight that left nearly killed him, and using that to make fun of Vader's condition may ''be harsh) '''You have the force to move objects; I am a force truly evil!' (Being the orchestator of the biggest genocide in history is way better (?) than being a small-scale reality warper. This could also mean "I'm bigger than that Force") Even went back in time and turned you vhack in ze prequel, (Vader's badass decay (?) in the prequels, which lead to complaints of the fans of the character and the franchise. So Hitler basically says that he did it to screw with him. Nothing impresive) 'Cause look at you! You're not even a real person! (Good one! This not only means that Vader is barely a person anymore, but that if he lived in Germany during Hitler's reign, he would have been sent to the concentration camps. Noice) I preferred you in Spaceballs: ze Rick Moranis version! (He means that his potrayal in Spaceballs, a frikin' parody, is better than his professional potrayal in the triology. Rick Moranis is Jew though, which could mean either that he hates Vader more than he hates jews, or that he would send him to the concentration camps. I don't think they thought of this tho, so this is just a meh line) Score: 70/100, some meh lines Darth Vader: You can't rhyme against the dark side of the Force! Why even bother? (It's like a war, two powerful leaders with a competent (?) army are dissing each other. He's saying: "Surrender now or suffer the consequences". The consequences here are getting insulted for 12 lines) So many dudes been with your mom, who even knows if I'm your father? (A your mom joke? Seriously? Just to dump his iconic phrase? However, Hitler looked up to his mother I think in contrast of his abusive father, so this may be deep to him. Otherwise, this is a very bad line) You're a pissed off little prick with a Napoleon dick! (NAPOLEON WAS NOT A MOTHERFUCKING DWARF.) You call that a mustache? I call that Dirty Sanchez on your lip! (eww. He made fun of his moustache by saying that it's literally shit. It also implies that Hitler got sodomized. At least is decent) You bitch, let me remind you who you're messing with! (As I said above, Vader is almost the same as Hitler, he's based ''on him. This means that Vader will be a tough one to beat in a rap battle and remind Hitler that he should be thankful that it's not a real battle) Everything that you did, I'm the mother fucker who invented it! (no) '''I'm the original Dark Lord; you're like the sorcerer's apprentice!' (NO, Vader came like 40 years after Hitler shot himself, Hitler is the original Dark Lord! But this could also mean that Vader is proud of his as an evil lord image unlike the real Hitler, who was called evil only by every decent human being his detractors) My Stormtroopers make yours look like someone took a piece of shit and cloned it! (Well, what is this? A reference to Hitler's Stormtroopers? That's actually clever! Vader's ones suck ass though. I think it's worthy to know that Vader is to only one to swear in this battle) Score: 40/100, You fail at life Adolf Hitler: You stink, Vader; your style smells something sour. (Indeed, I can't believe that this hammy villian is actually better at rapping than him. Since he stinks so bad he has to...) You need to vash up, dawg; here, step in my shower! (...take a shower. In the gas chambers. Used in the biggest genocide in the history. Vader sucks so bad that, with the "real person" and "Rick Maronis" link, he wants to kill him just like he did with the jews. GOLDEN) I'll turn all your friends against you; just my speeches breed haters! (If I understood correctly, Hitler speechs are so persuading that he can convince his allies and man to betray Vader, which may be harmful to someone so powerful. Noice one) Vat’s your lightsaber VS a clan of all your vite neighbors? (...What a bad way to finish with this verse, it's literaly saying "A group of people that think their skin colour makes them superior to everyone based on a flawed ideology is better than a letal weapon that can cut through a person easily and there's no easy way to counterattack other than using another one" The hell?!) Score: 60/100, that last line is horrible. ensues ''' (Holy crap) Darth Vader: '''Suck my robot balls! (This means "Fuck you, I'm doing this cuz I'm evil MWAHAHAHAHA") Now take a step back and let me freeze yours of! (So that last line was to make a pun with this one? Nice, altrough Vader is a sore loser and this was the only way to win) A little carbonite bath for your goose stepping ass! (Even Vader is horrifed at Hitler's actions, which technicaly makes him a good guy. That was well deserved! He's still a sore loser tho) We'll call my homeboy in Israel; see who got the last laugh! (Vader's best line. His homeboy is in Israel, AKA Jewland. Hitler's plan was to get rid of jews, so this means "Look. In the future a country like this exists. Your whole plan is a failure". Lit" Score: 60/100 '''Hitler: '''65/100 WIN '''Vader: '''50/100 '''Final Score: '''60/100 Overall This battle was definitely a step up from the last battle. A good intense beat, good impresions, decent visuals.The only thing lacking are the lyrics, which some are boring and uncreative. '''OVERALL: '''76.25/100 (Good) I hope you enjoyed! Feel free to flame in the comments! What's next? ClancHuranku (talk) 03:44, April 30, 2017 (UTC) Category:Blog posts